PART 2

Pausing With God 'HOT FLASH' 

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Age Ain't Nothing BUT A Number        

                                           

I've been "HOT" since I was twelve.

.....Those 6 1/2 years of hormonal balance spanned from the beginning of my first pregnancy to the end of my last. Getting pregnant gave my body an opportunity to understand and attempt the balance it was supposed be in all along and to be perfectly honest I felt so very good pregnant that I made other pregnant moms sick. But things change and sometimes they change drastically ... I had a tubal when my last child was delivered and within a month or two I was experiencing ALL the symptoms that had started when I was a young teen. It didn't take long before the hot flashes and night sweats were accompanied by insomnia, thinning hair, depression, water retention, mood swings and headaches as well as issues with my memory and concentration. Needless to say, I've had a very interesting life. Over the last year the hot flashes have really increased but while they were head to toe when I was younger most of them now are centered in my torso, chest and face. I have used cold wet washrags, ice cubes, cold showers, even putting my face in the freezer but none of that works. The only thing I've done that has made a difference is using a progesterone cream but you have to come off of it for 4 days every month. That is where my problems arose.... adding the progesterone cream kicked my system into gear enough that I felt amazing... BUT... for the 4 days I was not using it I was such a mean nasty ugly person even I didn't want to be around me. It didn't take long before my husband banned the cream from the house so there's nothing else I've found that helps. I just have to wait them out. I've dealt with severe mood swings as well lately. I blow up over the littlest things. I'm not talking about your normal "off" day either, I'm talking suddenly fighting the urge to run someone over then back up to make sure you did it right the first time.

For most of my life I've felt like my body and mind have betrayed me by acting against my will. This sense of being out of control has been so overwhelming at times. Now I don't know about you but I need help to get me through especially when I feel so out of control. What has helped me is finding women that I can talk to openly and get support from. This has been more important to me than trying to make my body come back into some form of balance. Through these women I'm surrounded by, I've learned to forgive myself when I act out under the influence of a good old fashioned mood swing. I've learned to humble myself and ask for help from others. They've helped me change my environment and fight the depression that my fluctuating hormones pushes me towards. They have encouraged changes in routines and habits in order to deal with insomnia and the memory and concentration issues. They have helped me learn to laugh and still have joy through all the craziness. These women have been a God-send to me but even with how awesome they are, the one I truly rely on most is God. You see, no matter how crazy everything seems to be, no matter how messed up I feel I am, how out of control I feel my body and mind are... He is always reminding me that He is still in control. And no matter what I'm going through He's there with me .... walking me through.

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